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But all teens need some amount of supervision, while you have to understand they will find a way around your peering eyes at some point. Be mindful of the world we live in and try not to stifle us more than we already are. Too many kids disappear and never found because no one know who the dangerous person that took em. Without the tool it make tracing who and where danger hide. With these high tech technology those that know how to take advantage of your kids to fool them into a trap of never returning back again is so real its not a joke when it does happen to your kids.

It depends completely on the child themselves. Also if the parent allows the child a freedom of speech and daily "internet allowance" there shouldn't be an issue. I've never had internet while I grew up, but once I went online Maybe my daughter was unusual. I was best able to get responsible behavior out of her by treating her as a responsible, thoughtful individual.

If she was a teenager today, I would absolutely have her read this article, and the comments; Then we'd have a discussion. I may actually do that anyway, as her oldest is 9 already. I don't think it is good to spy on the kids. Talk with them and let them know about the dangers and what they should and shouldn't do. A non-intrusive walkby from time to time can be enough to keep an eye on their activities. BTW the computers are in the living area, not in their bedrooms.

Let them know you are around for advise and help, and also let them know that anything they do on the computer can be traced. Sometimes it is necessairy to limit the options, but not all of the time. My children have two accounts on their computer. One for when they are doing school work, and one for their free time. The 'school' account has some limitations.

They can't play games nor can they go on the internet wherever they want. That way the diversion is limited and they can concentrate on their homework. The other account has no limits, but we trust on their common sense. In case of doubt we show our interrest and concern and have a talk with them. My son once tried to overrule the 'school' limitations and managed to do so up to a certain point. I noticed this fairly quickly and imposed the limitations again immediately. I blocked a couple more things on his computer to disable him from doing his trick again. He may have tried the trick again once, but now he doesn't even bother to try anymore.

I talked with him and told him that on the freetime account he had every possibility he needed, but the school account had the limitations for some reason. Once done with their schoolwork they are free as a bird, but untill then, their wings are clipped. Both of them understand and respect the rule.

There are plenty of tools around to break out of the boundaries, but a simple talk with respect from both sides can do miracles. Of course I have the benefit of being the system administrator on the office network and PC's, so I have a bit more knowledge then my children But I allways tell the kids of the limitations and the reason why. If they need access to something that has been blocked to be able to do their homework, they can come to me to talk about it.

Depending on the argumentation, I can grant them access one or another way which could be temporary access. After all, they should be able to make their assignments. My dad back in the days liked to snoop into our personal stuff, letters or anything we did not want him to find he did. So what did we do? He was out and we took a hacksaw and cut a hole on the inside back of the drywall above the door and put in a simple hinge. Having a good relation with your kid and trust is important, Setting up limits, keeping them safe But you have to be careful of crossing the limit that they no longer tell and now hide things from you.

If you are going to watch, even if it's a cursory glance.. This removes the incognito ability and you can just get a set of websites to look over. The benefit is you can discuss what they are doing or set up a home blacklist. We shouldn't need to spy on them. And we of course, should be able to be open minded enough to gain their trust. Are you out of your minds?

Conversations about the dangers of living in today fast spinning world are a paramount. We all know that childhood is all about testing the limits, but responsible parenting is still the only way to raise responsible children. Spying on them will only make them distrustful and deceitful.

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Remember they are not carrying a whole lot of insight and that is what parents are there for. I don't think that spying will ever be as effective as Ryan claims here.

I doubt it will ever be effective enough to be reliable. A much more effective solution is to talk to your children.

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Even from a very young age I understood that people on the internet could be deceptive, and that there was a lot of information that I shouldn't share. As well as education, I think that several other steps can be taken. Restrict their home computer usage to a single machine that is placed in a kitchen or living room, not their bedroom. Similarly, giving them a dumb phone rather than a smart phone can help.

This will hopefully increase awareness and keep children safe even when using computers away from their parents. It may seem like a stretch, but me and my siblings all got through our childhood and teenage years knowing of and avoiding all of the potential dangers of the internet.

I believe you should spy on them, and filter out sites that you don't think they should go on. Once they reach an age where they must get past them, they will work hard to do it. This will build their tech skills. Even if you fail to keep their innocence, you will improve skills that will only become more important! There is one first principle here: Where you live determines how a child is defined, how welfare is defined, what obligations apply and which don't.

But it still boils down to: Kids and theories of parenting methodologies vary so much there's so point in detailing them here. The question you must answer is: Lots of luck deciding. But if you have seriously looked for and studied the answers, you're like pretty close to the right ones. Thank you for 2 very intelligent reviews of these critical issues. I'm a grandparent and not currently involved in raising children, but I am sure that many parents will be helped by this discussion. I have two grown sons,both carreer Navy officers.

Carole and I traised our boys to always tell the truth,be honest with us and others.

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We were lucky in that drugs were never a problem. And there were no computers or net then either. I grew up on my grandfathers farm. He was an Old World German from Bavaria,and instilled in me from an early age you dont lie,cheat,or steal,and the only thing a man has at birth is his honour,and he better have it when he dies.

These things we taught Shannon and Thom,and I'm very proudto say they carry them yet. Now,Shannon is a Lt. If a parent is open and honest with the chiold,they'll never have to worry about the child going astray. First rule;never promise what you cant deliver!